I don't think it's a whole lot to ask to want to be invited to something instead of being expected to show up on account of it being family. My cousin had a birthday party yesterday, and I didn't even know she was having one till about 4 hours before it happened. The only reason I found out at all was from shooting the shit with my sister's man. So I wasn't very pleased. Then my cousin calls me FROM the party. It's already started and she decides it's time to call and ask me to come up. I politely declined. Now I can see a lot of people would say "She /did/ ask you. And you still didn't go. Why are you acting like a baby about this?" And I say, if I did go, the only thing it would have proved was that it was ok for her to completely forget about me. I would be condoning what she did, and I can't do that. I don't know which is worse. Not being asked at all, or being forgotten completely. It's a wonderful life.